


By Circumstance

by Water_Nix



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Gen, M/M, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-25
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-03-25 17:39:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3819172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Water_Nix/pseuds/Water_Nix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Gansey started bringing Adam Parrish everywhere he went, Ronan starting walking around in a cloud of rage. Pre-TRB.</p>
            </blockquote>





	By Circumstance

When Gansey started bringing Adam Parrish everywhere he went, Ronan starting walking around in a cloud of rage.

Not because Ronan hated Parrish, or even disliked the guy, but something about Parrish made him feel strange.

He didn't like the feeling of not knowing, not understanding. He spent too much of his life in that vein, a fist in his gut and a whirlwind in his head. Parrish just increased the speed of the turn, the depth of the punch. Ronan didn't get him. Seeing him around school always ramped up the gnawing uncertainty.

He was all pretty and good manners without the breeding to match. He'd pedal in on his piece of shit bicycle and keep his head down as though terrified the other boys would call him out on his poverty. And they probably did. Most of the Aglionby guys were epic dicks, snobby, rich little fuckwads. Gansey could have been like that. Maybe he came across that way to some. Maybe to Parrish, until Gansey decided to adopt him as his favourite new pet and trot him out all over town.

What pissed Ronan off most was the way Parrish looked at Gansey when Gansey wasn't paying attention. Like he was a God. Like he was this perfect _thing_. Ronan wanted to punch him and not punch him to the same degree. One and negative-one add up to nothing. Ronan punched a lot of walls.

And then Gansey just had to say something, being Gansey, and Ronan's knuckles were busted up for a week afterward, blood dripping and the words "there's no need for _jealousy_ " playing on a loop in his head and the brick wall _right there_ taunting him with Gansey's goddamn platitudes.

And Parrish looked so fucking piss-your-pants scared of him sometimes, and that made him feel the most confused and pissed off of all, because he never did a thing to Parrish and fuck, why did his eyes have to look all wide and Bambi-like when Ronan said the stupid shit that he just couldn't seem to squash down in his head before it crawled out his mouth?

After a while, he stopped being so angry. He never stopped being confused.

Declan saw them together, saw him being friendly with Parrish, saw them alone sometimes, but mostly with Gansey. Seeing them alone seemed to upset him most. Ronan liked Declan's upset. He didn't like the reasons behind it.

He caught them outside of Monmouth Manufacturing on a Saturday night, lying in a dusty patch under a tree after tinkering with the Pig. Ronan couldn't help himself sometimes. He looked when he didn't expect to be caught; he touched when he let his guard down. He played with Adam's fingers, pretending to show him how easy it would be to break one. Declan cleared his throat above them. His mouth was pinched. Ronan slotted his fingers through Adam's and concentrated on the engine oil that transferred between them. He hated Declan's face. Hated the familiarity of it, the similarity to his own.

The next morning in church, Declan said under his breath, "Go to _confession_ ," stretching the word out like a hiss.

Ronan broke one of his fingers when he returned to Monmouth that day. Gansey rushed him to the hospital to get it splinted. Ronan blocked out Gansey's chastisements, staring at his bloody knuckles. Fuck Gansey and his mother-henning. Fuck Declan and his superior, knowing looks, his fucking judgement. Fuck Parrish and his fucking... _face_.

And his everything else.

Ronan bent his broken finger back into place. The car swerved, Gansey yelling at him when he screamed in agony.  

"What is _wrong_ with you?"

Everything and nothing.

He closed his eyes and breathed through the pain. 


End file.
